Recently I was sitting in a very uncomfortable spot. I was squirming like a child squeezed in between two adults with no where to go. While struggling to contain the energy moving through me, I didn’t want to feel the emotions that were pressing me. I didn’t like where I was in my life. I wanted to move out of this uncomfortable spot onto something more pleasant, happier.
For a while, I kept these annoying feelings at bay. It was easy to give into cravings from outside sources that numbed me so I didn’t have to deal with the pink elephant in the room. I reached out to friends, watched non-stop Netflix, even had an extra glass of red wine.
I knew exactly what to do, yet sometimes, in my own infinite wisdom, I still choose not to follow what I know is true. I was resisting the inevitable emotions. And, when I do— I also know the consequences. I become even more numb to my feelings, lose connection with my body, and it leads me to a downhill spiral of feeling even worse than if I would have recognized it in the first place! And, isn’t that what many of us do? We push our emotions deep into our bodies ignoring their important message to us.
Finally, my body, mental and physical discomfort couldn’t take the pressure any longer. I realized, happier would never come until I embraced what was right in front of me. I got still and began to allow the dissonance. As I welcomed the stillness, I leaned into the uncomfortable feelings that were ruminating within me. Although my couch was comfy and I was living in a warm, safe beautiful house, my body felt like an intruder was attacking it. It was on full-guard with my adrenals in overload defending me from some invisible force.
I spent the next hour connecting to myself again. Feeling into whatever emotions were swimming to the surface of my psyche. I felt them, named them, acknowledged them, and lovingly allowed them to be. Each emotion and feeling had been screaming to be heard, not judged as good or bad. Just heard.
I invite you as well to welcome that uncomfortableness you may be experiencing. During your time of allowing, it’s important to:
- Be compassionate and loving with yourself.
- Notice what is happening around you and inside of you.
- Recognize if we are resisting or afraid.
- Allow what is and not judge it as good or bad.
What happens when you allow whatever is? You connect to the present moment seeing the shinning beauty of that moment—no matter the actual circumstance. Your soul smiles. You feel satisfied and relaxed. Happier. No longer squirming trying to get out of something. Or, wishing, I’ll be happy when. It’s NOW. The time is now to be happy.
My ex-husband of 25 years would tell me that we would have fun when he retired, which was another 15 years away. He stayed busy working, not understanding that I needed him now as a husband and father of our children. He was putting off being happy, enjoying moments of time together in lieu of an inflated paycheck.
If you’re uncomfortable with where you are now in life, you’re not living in the present. You are not feeling the emotions in your body that are screaming to be heard. You are living in the past or somewhere in the future. I’ll be happy, then. When X happens, I’ll be happy. When I have X, I’ll be happy. I’ll be comfortable then.
We get to choose. Happy is a choice. Allowing is a choice. Living in the present is a choice. When you chose today to live in the present moment, you allow what is. You embrace the good, the bad, the beauty, the suck, the comfortable, the uncomfortable, all of it. And, it’s all perfect.