What triggers you and makes you go from 0 to 100 in nothing flat?
What exactly are triggers? To be triggered is to experience an emotional or physical reaction to something. People could trigger us. A smell. A place. A substance. It could be anything that is a reminder of something intense that happened to us.
Triggers are easily identifiable by our reactions. Most of us know what triggers us. Often, we’re caught off guard. You know you’re experiencing a trigger by how you react to something.
What shows up in your life that happens over and over that you react to? How does it affect you? And others around you? Generally, we’re quite reactionary.
Examples of circumstances that could trigger you:
- An unexpected bill in the mail
- A comment from someone
- People not showing up for their appointed time
- People showing up late
- Being overcharged
These are just a few examples. There are hundreds, if not thousands, of people, places, smells, comments, and circumstances that could trigger any one of us. We are all walking around with open wounds just waiting to be healed.
4 Steps to Heal the Trigger
1-Accept responsibility and allow awareness to come forth. Begin to see the situation with a wider perspective. Ask yourself, What’s my role in this?
2-Name it. What’s the feeling that I’m experiencing? Is it abandonment? Is it greed? Loneliness? When was the first time I remember feeling this feeling?
3-Place it. Where do I feel it in my body? Our bodies hold cellular memory of the past. These situations come along in our lives to help us shake loose those stuck emotions.
4-Turn it around. We attract what we are BEING. Where am I _________________ (abandoning myself, not showing up for, not honoring and respecting my own time. etc.) myself? This isn’t always the case. Especially if we’re dealing with a narcissist or gaslighting situation, use your common sense. Don’t be so hard on yourself.
The world is a reflection of what’s going on inside of us. What’s your world showing you about yourself? What does it want you to see? Or what does it want you to have awareness about? It’s not about beating yourself up. It’s about getting quiet and becoming aware, going inward and examining. This is maturity. This is EQ—-emotional intelligence. EQ is the capacity to be aware of the control and express your emotions, and to handle interpersonal relations. judiciously and empathetically. EQ is the key to both personal and professional success. It’s not reacting.
It starts with awareness, though.
I have a couple of new affirmations to help that I’ve started to include in my day:
Everyone is doing the best that they know how.
and
I’m doing the best that I know how.
If I’m doing the best that I know how and everybody else is, there is no reason to go from 0 to 100. Take a breath, allow awareness to enter, and the charged situation to simmer. With that calmness, you can handle the situation diplomatically. And that’s emotional intelligence. No judgment and no blame.
In the calmness, ask yourself, WWLD? What Would LOVE Do? What would it look like if I led with LOVE in all I did? What would you LOVE to do in this situation that I feel triggered in?
Triggers make us human, AND they are controllable. Take that responsibility for yourself in releasing those stuck emotions.
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